im so not used to it.
after the months of talking to sleep and im back to all-by-my-own.
nights are quiet.
but i'll be just fine. 
it aint that hard i guess.
i just need to try harder and get myself more occupied and tired.
it aint that hard.
it's a decision made with no regrets allowed.




and now
i am awake.
late night insecurities. 
it's eating my brain up slowly.
it's pushing down the wall i built to protect myself.
you have no idea how much effort i have put into protecting myself.


i am learning.
give me a little bit more time.

as she said.
big girl dont cry.

dont cry :)